The courage to start. Again.

I wanted to eat cookies at the Grand Opening tonight (Mariel is going to the Milwaukee, Wisconsin mission, and Ammon is going to the Chicago, Illinois mission!!! Love them both and am so excited for them!) but didn't.

Instead, I came home and made an entire batch of peanut butter and honey popcorn, and a bowl of channa masala and rice.  Great way to show that you're in charge and to take some me time...by overeating.

I think I've kind of given up in a way.  I told Beth today that I decided I'm not going to worry about getting down to Dr. Fuhrman's recommended weight while I'm in grad school, because I'm going to keep stress eating.  However, as much as I want to sometimes, quitting is not an option (and quitting grad school is so much more tempting than to stop eating vegan).  The reason why I started eating this way was to be healthier, not skinnier.  And even if I can stay skinny on my current binge binge, it's not healthy, and it doesn't make me feel good.  I knew it was a bad idea, but I did it anyway.

I have a book about running called The Courage to Start.  I need to have the courage to start Eating to Live.  Again.  And to do it for real this time.  To take the time to do essentrics and either jump-rope or run each day.  And to get enough sleep.

Today's stats:
W: 141.2
E: pm yoga
B: banana and nuts
L: green smoothie
S: nuts and raisins
D: hummus and carrots, dal and rice, 2 bags of trail mix
S: bowl of pb and h popcorn, bowl of channa masala and dal.